Its pretty early in the morning and for whatever reason my mind just flashed back to 3 beautiful women I spent the previous evening with.
All of them are 'working' mothers in relatively young marriages.
What am I wondering about? Well simply if I am ready to join their club! Do I feel ready or qualified to?
Am I ready to be relegated to first division where everything about me would become less desirable and exciting!
Am I ready to loose myself to motherhood?! Here my time would bo longer be my own, my body would suffer the same fate and God knows whatelse.
Frankly my greatest fear is yet to be said...I am wondering if I am yet to discover who I am, would motherhood become the defining factor?
Would I become X's mother and nothing more or would I miraculously come to some sorta conviction of who I am or who I want to be to my child.
I don't want to be lost to the world, through my efforts or by those of my children unborn.
Still wondering...
WN
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